Thursday, February 9, 2012

Silent Killer

There are a lot of things not to like about the internet (like the fact that it makes things too convenient1), but wanna know what I love about the internet? It is a place of truth2. Sometimes there is so much truth spewing out of the internet that I wonder why it isn't called the truthnet.

However, occasionally - and don't let this shock you - lies will creep onto the internet. Take this ad for instance:
I have heard snoring called a lot of things - in fact, I have called snoring a lot of things - but silent has never been on of them.

(In case you are wondering, no, I am not going to address that hideous mask-like-contraption... too easy)

If you google silent killer you will find references to things like carbon monoxide exposure, high blood pressure, hypertension, diabetes, etc; you will even see this simple definition for silent killer, "Many diseases are silent killers in that they are silent (no symptoms or only vague symptoms), and that they are deadly."

Whoever made this ad is exactly half right3. Snoring is a silent killer (see sleep apnea). Silent? Not so much; according to wikipedia (the ultimate source of truth4), "snoring is the vibration of respiratory structures and the resulting sound".  Basically, if you are silent, you aren't snoring.

I will let Toby tell you about the real silent killer:

1 - Special thanks to Amazon Prime and Zappos; shopping has never been easier. I don't know why I ever go to stores anymore... Christmas shopping this year was a breeze.
2 - uh, this should be read with a sarcastic tone...
3 - Literally half correct. 12 characters in the term silent killer - 6 are true, 6 are false.  4 syllables - 2 are true, 2 are false.
4 - See note 2